06 October 2011

If You're Happy and You Know It... Well, You'd Have to Know It, Wouldn't You?

With summer falling away, fall settling in, and winter about to fall upon us, here are some of the things I do to lift myself out of sadness and up into laughter disproportionate to the events and my surroundings.

FAIL. Use key ringer to find... keys?

1. One thing I like to do is hide things around the house that I know people will need, such as their keys or wallets. Then when they start looking I say, "I'll help!" Then I find it almost immediately. It makes me feel good to have helped them out that way, you know?

Oh, don't feel sorry for him!
He's fine!

2. If I'm just at home by myself and don't want to go out or do anything special, I follow my dog around. Fairly closely, like he will me. Wherever he goes, there I am, right behind him.

He starts to get nervous pretty quickly and he's, like, looking around at me, left and right. Then his ears go down and he slinks around, trying to shake me. That just always cheers me up.

Nice costumes, boys.  I still win!

3. With Halloween coming up, I'll be getting ready for my annual act. I dress up like a Halloween dummy and sit outside with a bowl of candy on my lap that says "Just take two."  When the kids come up to get candy, I don't say a word--I just jerk a little and shove the bowl up to them.

One year, parents asked me to stop because a few kids were crying and one had done this impressive duck-and-cover to get away. But the whole idea was to cheer me so I started up again as soon as they left.

You can bet he'll be out there
pursuing his GED after the holidays.

4.  You know the day after Thanksgiving? When you go to stores, form mobs, crush other shoppers, get caught on video, and end up on CNN headline news? Well, that's the Biggest Shopping Day of the Year!

Yes, everyone knows already, but I think of the little people--the retail workers, biting their nails for 48 hours, not able to enjoy Thanksgiving dinner.

I don't shop that day; I ghost around the check-out counters and direct my question brightly to the clerks: This is the Biggest Shopping Day of the Year!  Didja know that?



  1. You "ghost around the check-out counters"? I do a similar thing on Christmas Eve. I will have my Christmas shopping done and nothing cheers me up more than to join the fray on December 24th and get in the way. I smile calmly at all the frazzled shoppers and clerks.

  2. We might want to schedule a series of these activities together. ***